Encountering Resistance- Trying to find a kinder, gentler path to changing behavior

1 01 2011

Meet resistance with persistance

It’s the first day of a new year; 1.1.11. This morning I was plagued by the thorn filled consciousness of a handful of ongoing situations wherein my desires and needs have been blocked by my own or others refusal to yield.

The workman on my houseboat who has assured me at least a dozen times that his repair work would be completed “tomorrow” for the last 2 months. A friend /business associate who ignores my email /phone requests over the last 8 months to do needed work on my website. Then there are things like getting my kids to clean up after themselves or take a “suggested” and reasonable course of action – like not smoking weed or doing their homework.

Then there’s me. My own refusal or procrastination in doing things that are needed or required. Wether it is attending to my health (by making and keeping medical or dental appointments), exercising (of ay type or kind), repairing or maintaining my vehicles, writing, or putting “feet” to my financial or vocational objectives.

I’ve been wrestling with these obstacles for quite a while now. I’ve been frustrated. Gotten angry. Been depressed and hopeless. Launched short lived campaigns. All without much success.

So this morning, I came up with a new strategy (really not new since it is inherent in many of the martial arts I’ve studied). Water, yields to the rock but continues its relentless path. I must remain resolute and persistent to my intentions yet flexible and yielding when I encounter unmoving roadblocks. How to get my way by gentle persistence, without beating my head against the rock.

Well, I’ll try it out anyway. It has to be better then this constant bloodletting.

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2 responses

1 01 2011
Louisa Avery

I don’t think we can get others to do what we want. We need to make it what they want also or find someone who wants what we want.

20 01 2011
Dewey

Amen, Louisa. It has taken a while, but learning not to be judgmental about other people’s choices and learning that when it gets down to it you are usually wasting your time trying to get another adult to change has finally sunk in.

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